Massage school update, and wrestling with Kundalini Yoga conflict

This is my weekly (or biweekly) update from Crestone Colorado, where I am attending a magical, transformative and intense massage school program.
It is truly incredible how much we are packing into these weeks. With a schedule from 7 am until 7 pm, we rarely have any free time.
I have completed part 1 of the 3 oral exams. We were tested on about 150 acu-points in various sequences. The nice friendly teacher turns into a gruff sensei for oral exams – questioning my confidence enough so I have to really push the right answer. It was good though. Next week is part 2 – the assessment portion. We are already doing complex Oriental assessments and acupressure formulas for various issues and complaints.
We are forced to do Kundalini Yoga once / week. And I typically dread it. If you are a dedicated Kundalini Yogi – turn away, skip the next couple of paragraphs, etc. I come from a place of radical kindness – from Zapchen Somatics where we rest a lot to allow the brain to integrate and soak up the neurological nourishment of playful, dynamic, soothing exercises or whether from a Pre- and Perinatal place that uses science to back up the fact that as babies we needed 20 – 30 minutes of rest time after a very challenging transformation from dim, quiet, private, cozy womb-resident infant to bright, semi-harsh, overwhelming-amount-of-new-senses air-breathing human new-born. Here is the problem though – needs like that rest time and other needs are often not met in most hospital births. And we develop the belief that life is tough and that we must push through, we must work harder to get what we need and want.
But this is not true. It is an impossible job to control everything in our world (but we try!). And I believe that some people transfer this inner unease onto their yoga practice. There is another way! A kinder, gentler, easier way to move toward ease and grace. Down the road I plan to teach this style. (there is an irreverent part of me saying, “I can call it Kundalini Recovery”) (if Kundalini is an authentic beneficial practice for some people, then I apologize)
So I am sitting with this inner conflict and pushing through my objection (not good!). I need to express my objection and let it out. Fortunately there are only 8 more sessions of Kundalini Yoga. Oh – and we are forced to teach an hour of it too. Hopefully I can find the gentlest Kriya there is – one where we are not holding our arms at awkward positions for 7 or 11 minutes straight.
Actually, the stretch pose (where you lift your legs off the ground as you do Breath of Fire) reminds me explicitly and distinctly of my time in the military. That was one of the positions the Drill Sergeants put us in when they wanted to “smoke” us (humiliate, punish, deprecate, etc). Not cool – I left the militaristic paradigm 13 years ago. I’d rather not go back to it.
Thank you for reading my rants and more to follow soon,
Big hug,
Kirby
P.S. I am gazing out at frosted mountains with a couple inches of snow on the ground with flurries wafting through the air. There is much to be appreciated here!

One quarter of the way through massage school

Hello dear friends and loved ones,

We are finished with a quarter of the magical massage school. It is difficult to believe.  Soon we will be heading downhill toward graduation.
Here is our typical schedule (now that we have settled into a regular routine):
7 am – Chi Kung & Walking / Nature Chi Kung
9 am – Breakfast break (where we now have Oral exams going on for the next 5 – 6 weeks as well – 2 ppl a day)
10 am – Lecture on Physiology or Traditional Chinese Medicine
12:30 pm – Lunch break (more oral exams if it is our turn)
2 pm – Lecture on the current modality we are learning – at present, that is Shiatsu (Japanese meridian massage)
3 pm – practice Shiatsu on each other (students)
5 pm – Practicum clients come in and we do an extensive intake, assessment, read their pulses, look at their complaints and formulate a treatment plan, then we execute said tx plan
7 pm – we are finished as far as group exercises go, but we generally have another 2 hours of assignments and we have to study for the oral exams
As you can see, our days are LONG. We even have class days one Saturday / month. So our 2-day weekends are very very precious.
This week was Losar – Tibetan New Year. And considering there are not less than 7 Dharma centers in town (or in the massive subdivision where this school is located), there were a lot of events going on.
Several of us went to a Losar party on Friday – there was dancing and good food. It was nice just to get out of the school for a night. To meet new people.
Small world – I met a retreatant (who only comes out of retreat once a month for a group event or once / year for Losar celebration) who knew my main teacher and who spoke very highly of him. He encouraged me to practice hard and to put the Dharma teachings into personal experience. That was very pleasant.
Not being able to go to a Losar celebration on Thursday, I wore a nice Tibetan tunic to class. That was fun. I did however eat at a restaurant owned by a Bhutanese family that evening – and met some more great people.
This is an interesting and dynamic community. There is a group of people working on a film about Chi Kung where they are using Kirlian photography to show how people can change their auric field by doing various Chi Kung practices.
There is another guy here who attaches a machine to plants such that when he plays music to the plants – they play different music back to him. He has put on plant music concerts and my new friend who lives nearby has also played shows with him. I have a plant music CD I need to listen to. Apparently it is very relaxing to listen to and he recommended I not listen when I drive!
Yesterday I went to a different Buddhist center – Vajra Vidya. This is a large Karma Kagyu center with a beautiful shrine room – large ceilings, massive Buddha statue, dozens of Thangkas, and enough room to fit 70 or 80 people. Plus they have 2 resident Khenpos and rooms for retreatants. So I got to practice speaking Tibetan – thank goodness he speaks a dialect that I know easily. See pictures below.
Then I hiked up to the Dream Road – a separate road whose only destination is a large stupa. I hiked over to the stupa, did some meditation, gazed at the incredible views across the valley and hiked back to my car – about 3 miles total.
I took a short cut back to the school. I’m hoping I didn’t do any damage to my car, but basically let’s just say I found myself driving my Corolla up a creek bed! Fortunately I was praying very hard – so I somehow didn’t bottom out.
Today I went again and offered Khenpo a bodywork session for next week. He was grateful and he recommended I do the Medicine Buddha practice if I am going to be doing bodywork / massage with others. Good advice I think!
Oh – and I discovered that around four miles from the school, I can get enough reception so I can use a pre-paid PIN number to make cell phone calls. First time I chatted with my parents in 3 weeks…
Thanks for reading my travelogues!
~KM

Valentine missives

The transformative energy of this place is starting to show… (did I mention Hogwarts previously?)
BTW – juicy info below, closer to the bottom… (Valentine’s is the hint)
I have had the two most curious ridiculously dichotomous days. This is on top of other experiences I have been having while doing Chi Kung or while meditating next to mountain streams or while doing a Zen-like walking / sitting meditation in a Tibetan Buddhist temple.
I had some boundary issues arise, which got amplified by my treating a client who had some anger around boundary issues. That was yesterday – and yet during my treatment of her – while I was very charged in my body – she received an amazing Chi-harmonizing treatment! It was miraculous almost – I had a vision of a red dragon when I was treating her Pericardium (the Heart Protector).
Then I was fuming after that… this Chi cultivation thing is maybe working too well (!) I lay in bed for 4 hours without being able to sleep. That was yesterday.
Today I woke up still highly charged, but down-regulated a good bit. I had no idea what today would bring, except I knew that I needed to deal with this boundary issue thing.

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Oh – I should mention there is a woman here I am interested in – we are slowly getting to know each other. And because this program is so rigorous, she wants to only be friends for the next 8 – 9 weeks and then see if there is anything after that. This is not going to be entirely comfortable for me, but honestly I think it is for the best – what better way to get to know someone (platonically) than at a 12-week hyper-intensive massage / chi kung / yoga transformation school?! I made her an extremely creative Friend-only Valentine nonetheless. I hope she likes it.
Also, while I was on the table receiving a treatment, I got two messages – one of the muse which showed me how to make such a creative Valentine in under an hour… and the other was a message that I should teach a one-hour lecture on Healthy Boundaries to the group – during our down time… which we don’t have much of… and to teach tonight… Eee Gads!
I taught on the 4 Levels of Trust. I mentioned the 3 strategies that people have for disconnection (even though they think some of these are actually healthy boundaries). And I covered briefly what a healthy boundary looks like. And then I somehow taught on Physiology – specifically osmosis, diffusion and pressure gradients. Oh and I threw in some Enneagram info for people as well…
I’m quite certain this is the only time in the 25-year history of this school that this lecture has ever been given. Maybe this school should be called the Creativity-Expanding School for Massage and Magic, or something like that.
So I taught that lecture tonight, it went well. People were pretty blown away. It is amazing how many people do not know what constitutes a healthy boundary. Then I came to my sanctuary bedroom away from the school and quickly made the valentine 🙂
And now, yet again, I am having difficulty sleeping (or I might need to wrap my head around the possibility that I don’t need as much any more).
Oh – BTW the Valentine involves a cipher – a key to unlock the hidden message in the mundane seeming words. Therefore it is a message hidden within an innocuous set of words on paper.
I am practicing decent self care now. For the first week, I was trying to do / give too much. Now I have a healthy routine set up.
Now it is definitely time to sleep.
Wishing you all well!
<3,
Kirby

Comprehensive Natal Chart Interpretation

Kirby will spend 90 minutes interpreting your Natal Birth chart. You can chat about any area that you like. This includes printed charts and it also includes about 30 minutes of preparation time! These are typically done on the phone, via Skype or in person if you happen to be in Virginia, USA.

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Snow falls in Crestone Colorado

I have been in Crestone Colorado for over two weeks now! Wow! So much has been learned at massage school and it has felt like an eternity at the same time – honestly, like we have packed a couple of months into these two weeks!

I wrote a little poem about how I was confused walking around a few days ago. There were snow flurries falling around me. Then I remembered a helpful little verse, and the sun came out to illuminate my body and my mind just as I stood with the powerful sensation of alignment of body, speech, mind, heart and breath:

Mountains Misty clouds low,

Snow falls,

Mind is turbulent,

Remembering body rests Like a mountain,

Breath like the ocean,

Heart like the sky.

The sun of clarity reveals itself,

Radiantly

 

Thanks for reading!

~km

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Magic mystery and massage school in Colorado

Wow what a full week!
We started practicums this week – meaning from 5 pm until about 6:45 pm we see a client each week day. There is a protocol we go through before giving them a treatment – at least we get paid, whether in money, or food (we have eaten really well this week!), or beautiful cards that a local artist painted, or a home-made tapestry, or crystals – someone gave me a gorgeous Tiger’s Eye pendulum.
I passed my first test – on acupressure. We are learning to read acupressure (acupuncture) pulses, meaning we can track whether there is deficient, normal or excess chi in any of the 12 organ meridians. On top of this, I have now learned somewhere around 150 acupuncture points (for acupressure / shiatsu treatments). We will begin doing shiatsu sessions toward the end of next week.
Chi kung is deepening even further – we are now starting to gather chi energy from the earth and from trees. It is really wild. My appetite is going down – I think this is due to my acclimating with the altitude, feeling more at home here with the routine and I also believe that all this chi kung and breathing practice is boosting my health. And I also wonder if all the breathing awareness during all the treatments we are giving is somehow contributing to my needing a little less food.
On a side note, I do my Buddhist practices from time to time – I try to start each day with a Buddhist prayer and to end each day with one – that way, I am book-ending all this Taoist practice with my more familiar Dharma practice.
We have a ton to study – we are receiving about 4 physiology lectures / week and we will have about two tests / week starting soon.
It is incredibly crazy to think that we have only completed two-weeks of school. 10 more to go! And yet it has felt like an eternity.
Some people are talking about visiting the hot springs – that would be the nudist (clothing optional) hot springs on Sunday. I’m not so sure – I desperately need to hike for exercise – don’t get much during the week! If I do end up going, I will be clothed 😀
There is a restaurant in town that is owned by a Bhutanese couple. They apparently throw a huge celebration for Tibetan New Year – which is coming up next week. I am trying to get someone to join me for that.
Much sleep to catch up on and meridians to study!
Wishing you all well,

Cosmic truths, insights and Super Bowl Sunday

Hello again dear friends and loved ones!

As I mentioned previously, school is awesome, full, rich and abundant with cosmic and tangible wisdom. Also, as mentioned previously, I would not be able to fully describe all that we are learning and delving into here. I would love to try, but it is mind boggling – better to chat about it in person!
I have experienced several insights though which I do feel capable of sharing. I have been dabbling in Chi Kung for about the past year. But without having a teacher who I work with closely (I love what you have shown me Jay!) and who explains the basic foundations, I was basically going through the hollow shell version of it.
Dan, the main teacher, explains what he is introducing thoroughly. Side note: it is fascinating – back in 2002 / 2003, I read the Tao Te Ching (one of the Taoist “scriptures”) dozens of times. I would take it into vision quests and just read it multiple times / day – this is because I felt it was a sacred text. But at that time, I was only putting the information in my mind. I was not experiencing what it meant in my body. I did not have a qualified teacher of it at that time.
There are a number of contradictions (at least according to Western thought) that I am realizing are true.
In working with the Chi – which is the energy that results from the relationship between Yin and Yang (negative and positive principles), we can begin to invite it to harmonize and flow smoothly by doing some simple exercises.
One interesting contradiction: by working with the Yin principle (receptive, passive, earth) in our bodies, we invite Yang into the system as well. So basically, by only working with a passive, humble, gentle, kind, soft energy, we invite strength and power. It is mind boggling to feel this, to experience this, to open to this wise conundrum.
Yang, the positive energy, is attracted to Yin. By strengthening our connection with the earth, with water (a very humble, receptive substance), and being in our primordial center of gravity – the Dan Then or Hara (below the navel), we attract and invite harmony and potency.
In other words, the less we are attached to Yang (the assertive, active, broad, heavens) energy, and the more we cultivate softening our edges, being humble, putting roots down into the ground, the stronger we become.
Another insight I have only glimpsed so far: we can choose to be still inside, no matter how fast we are moving on the outside. This is a concept which challenges my thoughts on the nervous system – if we are tightly wound or high strung, it seems like moving faster might increase catecholamines (adrenaline etc) which would not lead to inner stillness. Quite the opposite in fact.
Well, something inside of me is changing. Because I glimpsed for the first time while doing Tai Chi, that we can be more still internally, the faster we move externally. Pretty darned wild!
I am excited about weaving my knowledge of the autonomic nervous system, pre- and perinatal psychology and Western astrology with many threads of Eastern philosophy and healing wisdom. I don’t quite know what the tapestry is going to look like, but I know I will be a better practitioner for my time here at CHAC!
Gratefully,
Kirby
Thank you for reading!
P.S. I only mentioned Super Bowl Sunday because that is what day it is today. I am not going to be watching this spectacle. Instead, I will be studying, grocery shopping and then catching up on rest and self care. Oh and I will go visit Yeshe Khorlo Dharma center.

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News from a Heaven and Earth massage school

Dear friends and family – loved ones!
This is long.. maybe read in increments? ❤
I arrived at school on Sunday. I brought so much stuff (being prepared for arctic-like temps which haven’t come around yet) etc. For instance, I am the only student who brought a printer – so let’s just say I am going to be very popular and have some delicious food cooked for me as a result!
Anyway.. it took me about 5 hours to fully unpack my car and move into my temporary home.. I was out of my comfort zone at first, fortunately it only took 2-3 days to get into a rhythm and settled. At first, I had a 36-hour headache from the altitude and I was eating about 4 meals a day worth of food. That has improved now too – eating a normal amount (for me) and my head is doing much better. We are at 8,500 ft here at the Dojo (school).
On Saturday, on arriving in Crestone (where I have zero cell reception), I promptly visited a Buddhist stupa – a holy sacred-geometric building that houses relics and other sacred substances. Crestone (population 2,000 ppl) has at least three of these buildings that I know of. For perspective, Charlottesville & surrounding area (100K+) only has one or two. That was awesome – I met an interesting German family there.
Then I went to my new friend’s (Juniper) house where I spent that night. He is an awesome dude who built his own house and he is of great service to his friends and the massage school. I will take pictures of his house soon and share them – let’s just say that he has a green house with a wood stove under it – which is also a sauna. Very creative unique straw-bale designed house.
Then I went to visit the larger more remote stupa, up on the mountain slope. On my way to that stupa, I saw a sign for a Buddhist retreat center and made a beautiful pit-stop there. The care-taker gave me tea and a tour and I sat in their beautiful shrine room for close to an hour. (In case you haven’t noticed, Crestone has retreat centers of many flavors ALL OVER the place.) I promised to come back for their practices on Sundays.
Finally I got on the path toward the large stupa. The road turned gravel, and soon that turned to large rocky gulleys with snow and ice to spare! If I wasn’t so dedicated to seeing this thing, I would have turned around in a heart beat – imagine my little Toyota Corolla all loaded down with stuff trying to navigate a 4-wheel-drive mountain road… Yeah, it was worth it though! Such a breath-taking vista, the sun was setting, and they have retreatants who are there year-round doing solitary practice! Very holy area in my humble opinion.
School – whoa. I wish I could describe what is happening here on many different levels and dimensions, but you might not believe me if I tried.
Let’s just say that we study Chinese medicine, Chi Kung, Tai Chi, Kundalini Yoga, acupressure and Jin Shin Do (a trade marked version of acupressure). And we have only completed day 4 !!! Wow!
I already know about 75 acupressure / acupuncture points and how to work with them. Thank goodness I knew some of this material coming in. Wow wow Wow! I love it – the school is intentionally set up to stir the pot of all of us students and give us the tools to contain and process the emotional detritus that arises. It is a wild process and an extremely transformative journey (I surmise).
I love the group I am with. 4 males and 6 female students. Half of the students are young – under 29. The other half ranges from 29 – 43. Mostly all from West of the Mississippi – but very diverse – CA, Montana, Michigan, Iowa, Missouri.
I am staying in a house with the only student older than I. She is nice and we study and eat together at dinner time. She’s from Romania, married, no kids, quite a character. We have known each other before, so we quickly have become friends.
We begin each day at 7 am with Chi Kung or Yoga. Have a few breaks throughout the day, and end at 6-6:30 pm! Long days – which feel extremely long because they are. Four days of training has literally felt like weeks already. Maybe we will end up packing a year into 12-weeks? 😀
Getting late here. Will say more.
Believe it or not, the intensive format of the program here makes nursing school pale in comparison. Thank goodness this is just 12 weeks long.
Wishing you all very well and thank you gratefully for your support!
Love,
Kirby

Kirby’s journey West (toward a fresh start)

I am writing this from Trinidad Colorado, near the Raton Pass, very close to the NM border.

This trip so far is been really interesting. The first few days were like I was following and re-orienting around various journeys that my ancestors made.

My great great grandmother was actually from the Monacan tribe from near Amherst Virginia. And that is where I started out from.

She actually married my great great grandfather who is from Mississippi / Louisiana, and then they ended up in the hill country of Arkansas and Missouri. The Ozarks. And this pretty much been my journey so far.

I took a nice very pleasant detour to Asheville North Carolina, and then to Murphreesboro Tennessee. Where I visited a friend (Asheville) who has his finger on the pulse of the lineage of Buddhism I practice, meaning that I got the latest scoop on many things Drikung Kagyu. It was great to see him!

In Tenn, I taught some potent, simple and fun exercises for getting in touch with the heart and for opening to easy and graceful compassion. I taught them at my friend’s yoga studio. Later I discovered her studio is named, “Transparent Heart Yoga.” So it was perfect! She wants me to come back in the summer and lead some workshops there, so that will be nice.

And then I stayed in Fort Smith AR, driving through the beautiful soft rolling hills of western Arkansas. I pulled into a rest area somewhere west of Little Rock, in those rolling hills, and I did qigong in the trees and then sat and meditated where two streams come together – where a little waterfall is constantly gurgling. That was cool to find that along the interstate!

And also like my family’s journey, my grandfather and grandmother lived for a time in Tulsa Oklahoma. And I had to make a detour to Tulsa because the only Costco in the state of Oklahoma is there 🙂  The good thing is that Tulsa is only about 45 minutes added onto my trip. The challenging part was that between east OK, Tulsa and OKC, I had to stop at about 15 toll plazas. I ran out of quarters! It was insane.

And then I passed by Oklahoma City which is near where my dad was raised and went to school. And then I made a big push today, drove through Amarillo Texas, and then Raton New Mexico. And that is a part of my life (past) because I went to Philmont Scout Ranch twice in the 90s, and Raton is where the train stopped and then the Boy Scouts made the rest of the 120 mile journey by bus.

Fortunately I only have a three hour trip tomorrow to get into Crestone CO. Today was by far the most breathtaking of all, is I drove by mesas, small canyons, cinder cones, and then towards the end of today I saw huge towering snowcapped peaks in the distance.

In the past two days, I have seen not less than 15 – 20 birds of prey, mainly falcons and hawks – but they are getting larger the farther west I get! I saw a large hawk chewing on something as two large ravens were flying around its head. It wasn’t too bothered by them!
Oh and I visited the Caputin Nat’l Monument – where you can hike around an ancient cinder cone. I did a 2 mile hike and got a headache from the altitude – it was at 7,500 ft. Have to ease into it – and / or find some ginkgo!

So I left the friendly womb of well-known friends and allies in the east, and then drove across the Mississippi re-collecting bits and pieces from my family’s past. And now having gone past Oklahoma and Raton New Mexico, I’m on a fresh new adventure. Clean slate! I’m ready to have a new beginning and to make a push to get my business going strong (when I come back).

In the meantime, this massage school starts on Sunday and we dive in bright and early on Monday morning. I am very excited and ready to get this underway.

Love to you all,

Kirby
p.s. I am going to be very (VERY) busy once massage school (intensive) starts. Let’s wait and see how much I am able to blog between now and April 20th. 🙂

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Transitions, new beginnings, a grand adventure

As some of you know I am heading out on an adventurous road trip on Sunday. I’m seeing friends in Asheville NC, Nashville Tennessee, and then heading west for Colorado. There is a great massage school that I am going to be attending, it’s focus is on Asian bodywork. I am very excited and a bit nervous and activated. Big transitions like this are never easy for me, and it might not help that I have put most of my stuff in storage while I am in school.

I will be back in May most likely and definitely in June if not sooner. It is an intense program, as we will be in class and training and practicums for 50+ hours a week. I am definitely looking forward to it however.

In the meantime, now that my apartment is quite spacious with the furniture gone, it is a breath of fresh air to meditate. It is so easy to forget how our environment can affect our sitting. In the future, I need to simplify or at least have a clean spacious shrine room!

Okay, back to last minute sorting and cleaning. Gotta be out of my apartment by tomorrow evening!

Thank you for wishing me well! A 2,000 mile road trip journey starts tomorrow.

May all sentient beings know vast spacious mind.

~km

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