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Do you ever have a day where you just feel like balling up in a dim corner somewhere? Preferably a cave or a safe, blanketed section of your bed?
If and when this happens, what are some options? Well, we can submit to those desires for solitude (read isolation) and inner stewing, and continue to lay in a potentially miserable heap. Or… we can move our body, stretching, doing yoga, walking, biking, etc, that may help to move the stagnant energy and pump some warm juice into those frozen tissues. Also, we can speak with a trusted friend, a spiritual friend, someone who is compassionate enough to tell us where we are going wrong in our mental attitudes, if applicable.
Just to be clear, it would be good to check in with your system. Why exactly might you be feeling this sluggishness? Did we have two drinks too many last night? Are we getting sick? Or are we living in alignment with right livelihood, doing our best to work through our psycho-spiritual stuff, and now we have just chipped off a big chunk which may take some time to dissolve and integrate? Therefore, once we determine why we are feeling “blah…” Then we can proceed appropriately. And if it would be good to take some action, what might be best? Above I mentioned we can cover up and hide, or… we can do some yoga, or… we could check in with a valued friend or coach…
Better yet, we can go for a walk with that spiritual friend! What do you think? Then, as you both move your bodies, you can chat about how you are feeling, knowing that it is (hopefully!) safe to tell them anything and that they will give you that compassionate answer that you desperately need. But if they are someone who will hold back and support your mental patterns no matter what you say, then don’t expect wisdom or penetration through your muddled resistance. They must be someone who is strong enough and confident enough to tell you like it is. Then you will have the chance to decide whether what they say is true for you or not (sometimes we don’t want to hear a direct truth!).
This is why I think it is so vital to have someone, or preferably, multiple someones who are spiritual friends. In Eastern jargon, you could call these people “Gurus,” although I hesitate to use that term. This is because an authentic Guru has done ALL his or her personal growth work, they have dissolved the gross layers of their ego and they have stabilized spiritual realization, such that they can consistently be of benefit to you and many people (or they will know their limits and stick within their bounds in skillful, colorful, modest ways).
So, if you find yourself in a personal pickle, know that everything changes. Yes, even this too shall pass. And, if possible, work with someone, here in the West it could be a therapist, a coach, a counselor, a professional advisor, etc, or it could even be a spiritual friend or spiritual teacher (although you should investigate this last category very very thoroughly!), work with someone who can truly be of benefit to you.
We have many blind spots. Even if we are lucky enough to have the awareness of the majority of our inner foibles, our ego may still be strong enough to throw up the occasional smoke screens, meaning, don’t trust your perception entirely – find a wise spiritual friend or mentor and get a second and third opinion. Especially if you find yourself with an inner conflict or confusion or depression. Identify your red flags. Have tried and true techniques and tools available to counter (tools for self-care) those red-flag-raising tendencies. And then structure your life so you are not constantly tempted or urged back into harmful habits (no use confronting the branches of the problem if the problem’s roots and trunk are sturdy and strong!). And most importantly, be gentle, be kind, it takes time, and above all, know that difficulty comes and goes, joy comes and goes, resistance comes and goes, friends come and go. Try to find a balance and rest there, in the middle, in alignment.
And know that this advice is not easy to follow. That is why you should investigate carefully anyone who is dispensing such advice. Yes, that would even include this oft-confused-ordinary-human-being author. Do these words make sense to you? Does anything touch an oochy place in your heart? Sometimes discomfort is a sign that something needs to be worked on. And if so, do you want to do that psycho-spiritual work, knowing it ain’t easy and it ain’t always comfortable! But above all, it will be okay. This stuff takes time. Coming into a comfortable alignment, in your body takes years, decades even. So kindness and a slow pace and lowered (read realistic) expectations are necessary.
And of course, perhaps you saw this coming, the author, Kirby Moore, when he is not talking about himself in the third person, is able to offer such advice, as he offers Spiritual Astrology Interpretations and Coaching within his private practice. If you are willing to lean into support, call him at (434) 465.0603 to schedule an appointment. You can also reach him at kirby [at] mkirbymoore.com
By the way, Kirby is starting a website which you can access at mkirbymoore.com At present, it is still being developed so pardon the one or two unfinished pages. But you can see what he offers, rates and you can purchase coaching / astrology sessions with him from there.
One thought on “Skillful means in addressing inner resistance”
Thank You Kirby~