This post is a comical rendition of the next post, which could be taken seriously. All of the information below is either false or greatly exaggerated.
Four years… wow… well actually I’m not going to admit how long it took me to finish my community college work and then I took a year off from UVa… Oh my word! Well back to the story… Metaphorically speaking, what did I learn in my “four years” at the University of Virginia?
First and foremost, I learned not to feed the groundhogs… I have heard horror stories about the squirrel problem at William & Mary (where my sister graduated)… but here at UVa, some of our groundhogs are larger than small dogs, stand on their hind legs and have learned to beg. But do not be mistaken! These are not beavers – do not feed them. Because… I’m tearing up, good golly, I’m gonna change the subject!
Second, while UVa might have one of the best (less-well-known) psychology programs in the country, and despite the fact that the UVa psychology program has the most undergraduates of any College majors… it’s building, Gilmer Hall, is a nightmarish maze of corridors and dead ends! That would be the psychology / biology building for those of you lucky enough to avoid wandering around in a stupor, wondering how you walked in circles passing the same landmark dozens of times. Yes, that’s right! Gilmer Hall must have been added on to by six different architects, who all had varying styles, (you might say who had two left hands) and who all could not decide on a rational system of completion. I am about to graduate and I still have not found my advisor’s office… (I happened to stumble blindly into his lab though and he helped me tremendously from there) I highly recommend printing out a map of this building if you are in the psychology program – you’re gonna need it!
Speaking of confusing buildings on Grounds… in addition to Gilmer, I would also recommend printing a map of Clark Hall – the entire Clark Hall that is; unfortunately finding a map with the new addition on it was nigh impossible. Therefore, when my Climatology professor said that if we could find his office, then we could probably pass his course… he was NOT joking! And speaking of walking in circles, once you do discover how to get into the new sections of Clark, there is a very good chance you will become quite discombobulated. But after the sixth or seventh time of wandering the halls, wondering how the numbers jumped from 346 to 396, despite the fact that you are looking for Suite 376, you may get the hang of it. If not, find someone old who looks like they work there and ask them. 🙂
And while we are on this subject, might as well mention Alderman. I’m confident there are some wizened students, bearded and bespectacled, who, having given up on getting out of the mammoth library, have decided to make a career out of reading ancient, rare texts. I’ve seen them! It has to be so! Once you go down and back, venturing up tiny, claustrophobic metal staircases, or out-dated elevators… you are putting your time-management skills on the line. You might escape and discover that cars are flying by and that the excellent UVA bus system has been replaced by high-speed trains on monorails.
Seriously though, I will mention that you must read the next post, because my experience and time at the University were special, marvelous and very edifying. The Grounds are some of the most beautiful in the world and the architecture will blow your mind if you stop to consider it (from the outside).